News from Vermont #383 No 1 Makes Syrup > Then We Do :)

June 22, 2017

Hello again Maple People,
My first thoughts rambled on: “Texting’s turning us all into automatons…why’d we even bother learning to talk…old Al Bell’s havin’ a bird.”. And then I looked up a bunch of quotations on “talking”, like we use to do, and most of them were a bit negative. It seems when using that ancient art, most folks talk too damned much. Besides that, I found through research that Bell didn’t even allow a telephone in his study…too much of an intrusion, he thought. And now, traditional telephones are getting to be a moot point anyway. If you want to communicate with anyone fifty or under, you best be textin’.
Recently I was arranging a meeting with a professional who happens to be a shapely young woman. Texting was our medium of choice. Needless to say, when I realized my intended message, “I’m around when you stop” got sent as “I’m aroused when you stop”, I was a mite embarrassed (she never stopped, by the way!) Yup, that’s another perceived attribute of the things…they think they’re smarter’n you are and if you don’t double check ’em, they sure can get you in trouble!
As much as I seem to indicate my overall acceptance of cell phones, there are a few drawbacks, like the people who shut their brains off when using the cussed things…things like texting while driving. So often these days I meet some “turkey” who’s driving well over the center line because of texting. So far the errant driver has always woken up just before a crash but someday, maybe my luck will run out. To such a fool I say, “how dare you…It’s my right to be safe on the road…not your right to be texting instead of keeping me safe!”.
Then there’s the combative effect. Conversations done the old fashion way might end in a fist fight, but they at least end. With texting, arguments persist…expletives fly back and forth and grow to shocking levels, sometimes for years!
Time’s also a factor. These days, this old man’s glasses are as elusive as, well, voice messages, and the combination of my fat little thumbs and a keyboard that’s tiny, makes texting a long and arduous job. Many of my texts take huge amounts of time, have foolish word abridgments like 4 for “for” and u for “you”, and are , or should I say “r”, full of typos. I believe, in fact, it was sometime post texting’s advent that I started noting a constant, faint rumbling from my grammar teacher mother’s grave.
Suppose, for instance, phone talking developed later than phone texting. Can you imagine the excitement…”OMG, I C its pos 2 jus talk…so kool. no typin. rad man like the homeys voice is rite their…so kuik n eesy!”. Oh brother, seems to me both Bell’s phone and smartphone’s text were pretty good ideas…that is until people started using them!

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